Run.
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| Running the Rapids Half-Marathon, Grand Rapids, MN |
I completed my first half marathon this past weekend. Simply put, it has been on my “to-do” list for a long time and for one reason or another, I never pulled the trigger. When I was younger without children (i.e. was in better shape and had all the time in the world), I had hoped to do a half-marathon, but I knew little of how to truly push myself to complete the training. I had no discipline to run that far nor did I have the knowledge to do the correct training. These past few years after kids, my running pace slowed to a snail’s pace and the time I had to run virtually disappeared. Yet the few times I took to run were life-affirming, always allowing me quiet time to myself. I also knew a little bit more about endurance from caring for colicky, sleepless newborns. I worked my way up to six miles on a few cool fall days and began to wonder if I could do more.
As my schedule faded to a summer free-for-all of long days with my kids, I began to wonder if this was my time. My time to train for the half when chaotic mornings rushing out the door were replaced with kids that slept in and ample time for a proper breakfast. I decided to go for it.
And so, in May, I printed off a “Beginner’s Guide to Your First Half-Marathon” and got to work. Looking back, I realize that working to do this race was the equivalent of having my third child. Ok. Ok. I realize it really wasn’t, but for me, running this race became quite similar to being pregnant – the plus side is that after the grueling physical experience, I got to go home and take a nap on the couch rather than try and keep a small human alive. So, if you will bear with my poor analogy, here is the reason my half-marathon was a bit like having a third child:
It’s So Exciting at the Beginning.
The first few weeks of training I was so excited. I had been begrudgingly running two miles on a treadmill throughout a ceaseless winter. Now, I was outside! I had a goal! Same with pregnancy - it happens! You’re pregnant! And it’s exciting even though food becomes your enemy, as does the smell of your husband’s body wash (and most smells), and you want to sleep all the time. The beginning stages of training are similar: everything hurts but it’s so exciting because you’re doing it! You’re training for a half-marathon! And you’re sure the pain and exhaustion are only temporary…right?
It’s Not Temporary
Ok ok, yes pregnancy is temporary. As is training for a race (although I’m sure there are some ultra-runners out there somewhere who could prove me wrong). But as the morning sickness plunders on, your pants no longer fit and the lightning bolt of pain from your back down your leg strikes frequently and fiercely, it no longer seems temporary. Rather, it becomes the norm. You can’t remember a time when you were not pregnant. The excitement of a new pregnancy begins to fade just as the excitement of race training wears off pretty quickly.
It wears off pretty quickly when your muscles ache constantly.
It wears off pretty quickly when you must set your alarm for an ungodly hour each morning.
It wears off pretty quickly when you snap at your husband for having to leave for work early or go out of town, thus ruining your week’s workout schedule.
It wears off pretty quickly after a long week with the kids and Friday night rolls around without a glass of wine because you have to wake up early for your long run the next day.
It wears off pretty quickly when you try to squeeze in a long run before you spend a hot day walking around the zoo (oh my legs…)
It wears off even more quickly when it is replaced by fear caused by digestive issues on a long run (where is a port-a-potty?!!!)
I vaguely remember having most of these problems (symptoms) whilst pregnant. And just as when pregnant, life becomes more than what it was before. You must now plan to get in the doctor appointments and be the designated driver because you’re no longer thinking about just you. You’re thinking about the baby. Similarly, when training for a race, you must plan because life becomes more than what it was and your body and schedule must adjust to accommodate it.
Beef. It’s What’s for Dinner.
Until I had my first child, I was a borderline pescatarian. I did not like to eat meat and only ate chicken and fish sparingly. I loved trying new vegetarian recipes and eating tons of fresh fruit and vegetables. After I became pregnant, I survived on Wendy’s hamburgers with my daughter and Costco hotdogs with my son. It’s a wonder they never sprouted a third eye. But when you’re nauseous for five, six, seven…sometimes more weeks, you eat what sounds good. And what sounded good?
Beef.
Similarly, I could not eat enough hamburgers this summer as I trained for my run. Luckily, I was able to cook healthy wholesome meals without dry heaving, but most nights I wanted the same thing: a big juicy burger. My husband grilled more organic beef patties than I’d like to admit and every time we went out to eat, I ordered a hamburger and French fries. Nothing sounded better. Even to this curry loving, vegetable worshiping omnivore. Apparently, growing a human and running 15+ miles a week requires a lot of cow…uh, I mean protein.
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| Sorry, cow. |
You Cannot Truly Prepare for the Race
Just as I took prenatal yoga classes and birthing classes at the hospital, nothing (no not even that ridiculous pain chart) can prepare you for the pain that is childbirth. Do I need to go into details?
No? Good.
Now with my half, I had run 12.5 miles two weeks before the actual event. And I felt great! So, a mere 13.1 shouldn’t be so bad, right? Wrong. There is no preparation for the slow passage of mile markers (I thought for sure we were on mile nine…ugh but only mile eight?), the incessant jackhammer pounding of your joints, and the screaming ache in your legs begging you to stop, although funnily enough, when I did stop they screamed even louder.
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| Almost there. Legs screaming. Photo courtesy of Emerald Heart Photography. |
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| Finishing my race. Photo courtesy of Emerald Heart Photography. |
And now, as I ice my knee in the backyard, my daughter runs around the yard pretending to “race” like mama. Oh, my heart…
People Want to Know When You’re Doing It Again
As you sit blissfully with your newborn whilst bleeding profusely from “down there,” there is nothing more mind-boggling than a doctor asking about birth control. WHAT???!!!! You just went through the most painful experience of your life, and while the outcome is pretty awesome, there’s still a lot of recovery going on. And the doctor wants to know if we’re going to have sex again?? And then if we’re going to have another baby? Can’t I just enjoy the moment? What sort of masochistic place is this??
The same goes for a race. My legs hadn’t even stopped throbbing, nor had I caught my breath when I started fielding questions as to if I would run another half marathon. Would I run a whole marathon? WHAT??!! Sure, it may happen again, but now is the least likely time for me to think about wanting to do it again.
For now, I’m going to enjoy a week of resting my legs, sleeping in, and enjoying a few alcoholic beverages without the worry. I earned it.
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